what do we do now, superman?

digging in the crates + fragments + benito

I’ve been pulling fragments from old journals and notebooks, wondering if I can repurpose them into something else. I’ve been thinking a lot about the Mickalene Thomas “All About Love” exhibit I saw a year and a half ago, and how it made me feel about my own creativity.

Throughout the exhibit, you would sometimes see the same image used in different ways, like she was pulling fragments from her notebook and repurposing them in other ways.

I opened a poem that made me cringe, and I remember letting one of my friends read it; her response was, “What is it supposed to be saying?”

I never opened that poem again.

I did last night.

Not everything is perfect the first go round

And even if we think it’s perfect, sometimes we aren’t finished with it.

Sometimes we want to think about it in different ways. Hear it with new ears. See it with fresh eyes.

Sometimes we need that.

Sometimes I need that.

Last night, I needed that.

Bad Bunny

I spent all day at work today talking about Benito and reading other people’s thoughts on Benito, and I still feel like I need to watch that halftime performance a few more times so I can experience it in different ways.

There was so much there to connect to, and I’m not even Puerto Rican.

I think part of the connection was seeing someone use their art to make an unapologetic statement about the past, present, and future of the United States of America, and as a Black woman, I relate deeply.

A lot of the time, whiteness can only see itself through its own lens, and when we’re filtered through that lens, we don’t fit. I’m OK with not fitting within the white gaze, and I think Benito was last night as well.

I’m still processing it, though, and I’m working on breaking myself of the habit of having hot takes, so this is it. For now.

a fragment

Accountability is like Kryptonite for niggas who mumble their words, give ambiguous answers, and avoid answering direct questions.

If he didn’t say it, then you can’t hold him responsible for it, right?

Dudes who won’t tell you they have a girlfriend unless you ask the question with the exact wording that won’t allow them to lie, either by omission or otherwise.

Niggas who ask you, “What do you mean by that?” when you ask a thing that needs no further interpretation.

The ones who will avoid calling you rather than admit they were wrong.

The dude who gets upset with you when you call him on his bullshit. “Why you bringing up old shit?!”

The ones who want you to make their choices for them.

“Do you want ice cream or pie?” “They both sound really good.”

And any nigga who ever answered your question with another ridiculous ass question.

For these niggas, accountability is like Kryptonite.